Grannyisms for card players

Song Stuck on the Brain: "Hallelujah I'm a Bum" (Blame it on Granny Boo)


Speaking of which, I survived the Canasta Marathon. Angel and I arrived in Springfield at 12:30. By 1:30 we were playing cards. In the 24 hour period that we were with Granny Boo, we spent about 12 of those playing cards. When you figure in sleeping, three meals and the occasional bathroom break, you can see that we pretty much did nothing BUT play Canasta.

It started out pretty well, with each of us winning a game for the first three, and we didn't have to help Granny cheat too much. As the weekend progressed, however, it got harder and harder to help her win. By the final game I was tossing her every card I had that would make her points and bypassing stuff when I could that would help me. Of course you can't get away with that too much cuz as soon as you miss a card you should have taken, Granny's having a caniption fit. "Stupid! It makes no sense not to take an Ace!" By sheer force, we managed to finagle the cards so she would win the last game. Of course she claims it doesn't matter to her. "It's just a card game, I just enjoy getting to play with my girls. Makes no never mind to me if I win."

Yeah- and pigs fly.

Overall though, it was a good enough time. We love our Granny, despite her colorful personality. I'm glad we were able to have a trip where we all got along. Her health is starting decline (she's 82) and who knows how long we'll have her around. It was for this reason, that I decided it was time to make a record of some of her 'Grannyisms'. It's amazing the quantity of phrases she uses while playing cards. I'm not sure how many are unique to her, but I think they are unique to her hillbilly generation, so in an effort to preserve the history of a dying language, I offer you these.

"Oh, Cat Hair!" The perfect expletive for when you've just spilled your coffee or dropped something.

"Oh, Flitter!" Good for when things aren't going your way at all.

"Turkey Butt" Someone who is annoying you. Angel likes to use this one.

"Stinky Butt" An endearment for the toddler and diaper aged crowd. Granny calls my 3 yr old niece this.

"Dad Nabbit!" Another useful substitute for words that shouldn't be uttered.

"Hallelujah I'm a Bum" Not really a phrase so much as an annoying song to sing as offkey as possible so as to annoy your card enemies and make them play poorly.

"I just hate you, I wish wasn't friends!" A phrase from one of her childhood friends. Said jokingly when someone steals the pot of cards you've been drooling over for 5 rounds.

"Oh Bullwinkle!" Yet another useful expletive. (She has a lot of these.)

"Well I'll be the son of a biscuit eater!" Said when utterly shocked or amazed. Like when drawing two Aces or Jokers at a time.

"Well shoot fire in the buttermilk jar." See 'biscuit eater'. Note: Only an Ozarkian Hillbilly can make fire and jar rhyme. You must use the proper accent. Ex: 'Shoot Far in the buttermilk Jar'.

"Kafooey!" The equivalent of 'shoot'. Some may say Kaflooey, but that would be improper syntax.

"Ooo, my nose itches, I like peaches, somebody's got a whole in their britches." Said while scratching your nose. Again, note the accent to make it rhyme. Ex: 'My nose eeches, I like peeches, somebody's got a whole in their breeches.'

That concludes our Hillbilly Language class for the day. Class dismissed.
A.

Granny Time

Sung stuck on the Brain: Stacy's Mom (heard it while watching Psych tonight and it stuck.)

Ah, finally the end to another crazy week. I've had my SciFi Friday fix. Loved the special joint episode of Stargate that had the SG-1 team visiting Atlantis. Watching Rodney and Samantha go head to head is hysterical.

Next up is a visit with Granny Boo, which means hours of listening to old school country and playing Canasta. Actually, Angel I will be playing Canasta and Granny will be cheating. She taught us to play when we were too little to hold all the cards by ourselves. She'd go easy on us so we could win. As we got older, she didn't have to try very hard to let us win. We'd gotten pretty good. Now she rewrites the rules as often as possible, sneaks peeks at everyone's cards and 'accidentally' knocks the discard pile over so she can see what's in the pot. Even then she still struggels to win, and when Granny is 'sucking hind tit', she's not pleasant. Lately we've had to resort to cheating in her behalf so that she can beat us. You know it's sad when every effort you make is to throw her points without her knowing.

She'll say, "Well, Stupid! What did you do that for! I've got six of those on the board. You just gave me a natural, that's five hundred points you know!"

We just nod and say "Uh-huh, what was I thinking? Guess I'd better be more careful."

Oh well, every family has their colorful character, Granny is ours. It should be an interesting weekend. Hope you enjoy yours.

A.

Treasure Hunters

Song Stuck on the Brain: Button Off My Shirt by Ronnie Milsap

I hate reality shows - okay, I do like American Idol and America's Got Talent, but usually I hate reality shows. However, I've become addicted to the new Treasure Hunters on NBC. Have you seen it? Ten three member teams are competing for a million dollar treasure by hunting clues around the world. They've scaled glaciers in Alaska, dove in the waters off Hawaii, trekked through the swamps following the Underground Railroad and now they're in Europe.

I admit, I'm usually just as stumped as they are with some of the clues. I'm probably worse, because I get the benefit of the camera pointing out clues. In fact, I would totally suck if I was actually on a team. But last night I was actually yelling at them, because they just kept missing the obvious.

First off, they had to travel to Dover Castle to search for their final clue. They were told that the arrow would point the way. My first thought is, 'Go up to the highest point on the tower and look out, just like you did with the light house clue a couple of weeks ago'. But NOOO, most of them did that last and wasted huge amounts of time. Then, when they did see the arrow shaped piece of wall on the grounds, they didn't think it was the clue. They finally got it though and found a piece of parchment. They were told it held a secret code and they'd have to solve the code to get their final clue. My first thought? Invisible ink. I learned how to do it when I was six. You use lemon juice to write, then apply heat to make the images appear.

Team Airforce

So, they go to the church where the clue is hidden, walk in and candles are everywhere. I'm like YES! Go use the candles! Nope. It took them hours to figure it out. Team Airforce had gotten lost (a rarity for them. They're machines.) but when they did arrive, they tried it within like ten minutes. Which is why I'm rooting for them to win. They're so smart and so far have avoided all the drama that keeps popping up among the other teams. Even when they got stuck with the Fogal Family, they kept their word and helped them along even though they nearly lost out because of it.

The Fogal Family consistently formed alliances and then screwed the other team to get ahead. They were so horrible, the rest of the teams coined the term 'Fogaling' - they especially enjoyed "Fogaling the Fogals". The Fogals got dropped last night though, so it will be interesting to see who becomes the new hated team. I kind of expect it to be The Geniuses, that's who I want dropped next. They get on my nerves.

A.

Rising Superstars

Song Stuck on the Brain: Home by Marc Broussard

Wow, what a busy weekend. It started Saturday morning at 6:30 am (after only 5 1/2 hours sleep. That's my fault.) It was our writer's circles first meeting and I was hosting brunch. After that, it was pretty much non-stop. I hooked up with Angel and Ang for a few hours, then my three kiddos came to spend the night.

I wasn't sure I'd find something that they all wanted to do together. They're 11, 9 and 7, so getting them to agree on an activity to do together can be challenging. As it turned out, they found my mic setup for the computer and begged to record their own CD's. I thought, "Sure, why not?" They each picked two songs from my Karaoke set and then took turns recording. I was actually really surprised at how well they all did. They had one or two run throughs to 'practice', then I'd record - usually getting it in one or two takes. Trust me, we were not going for perfection here. I wanted it to be fun for them. To let them hear their voices and not be scared of it. They had a blast. They didn't always stay with the music and key was more of a 'suggestion', but what surprised me was how often they DID stay on key and with the music. For kids who have had no vocal training and don't sing in any outside activity, they show a pretty natural ability. Especially the youngest. She heard the cues in the music the quickest, although I think they all have a lot of potential. I'd love to see them get into music, even if it's only a school program.

Here's one of the songs that the 7 year old recorded.



Clipboard Secrets Funny Videos Funny

On Sunday, I took the kids to my parent's for family dinner. They all took turns playing their CD's for Nana and everyone else. My youngest niece (she's nearly 4) was all a twitter over it. She kept saying, "I have a song too." Finally, Mom said, "You do? Where is it?" She replied very matter of factly, "It's in my mouth." Cracked us up. We asked her to sing us her song, but then she got shy with all those eyes on her. Finally, she covered her own eyes (she thinks that keeps us from seeing her) and sang the worm song. You know the one - Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go out and eat worms, Fat ones, Skinny ones... . You get the picture. She's so cute.

Man, life would be so boring without kids around.
A.

Hillbilly Rockin'

I love Josh Gracin. His voice is so mellifluous... Okay, I'm done channeling Josie Grosie.

I do love his music though. Angel and I went with Judy and my nephew Ben to see him in concert last night at the Voodoo Lounge. Nice venue by the way. If you've not been out there, it's a great place for small concerts. Anyway, we had a table in the balcony that overlooked the stage, so we had a good view.

He really puts on a good show. Sometimes new performers like that, the shows can hit slow spots where it almost feels a little awkward, but he didn't have any of that. His band was great and he interacted well with them and the audience. He threw a ton of stuff to the audience. Playing on the drums with the drummer (multiple times) then tossing the sticks to the audience. He strummed the guitar and gave away the pick. Threw several free t-shirts as well as the hat he was wearing. At the end of the show, he took a stage towel and rubbed it all over the lead guitarists head and then his own before throwing it out too. I thought the girl that caught it was going to pass out. You could tell he was having fun and it was all a joke to him.

His music set was great too. He played all his own hits like Stay With Me (Brass Bed) - my favorite, Nothing To Loose and Turn It Up. He played some new songs from the upcoming album, like It's About Ya'll. Then he covered a variety of great hits from Journey's Faithfully, Garth Brook's Ain't Goin Down Til The Sun Comes Up, Mercy Me's I Can Only Imagine and more. It was really more of a Rock and Roll/Country concert and I like that mix. Josh has a real range to his voice and stylings, a lot more than I would have guessed from his Idol performances.

We really had a lot of fun. It was loud and exciting and that's what concerts are all about. I wouldn't be happy if I didn't walk away hoarse from cheering, rubbing my palms from all the clapping. We haven't done as many shows as I'd like this year, but we have a couple more coming up. I'm hoping to nail tickets for Josh Turner in September and Jeremy camp w/Hawk Nelson in November.

Rock on,
A.

I can hardly wait...

Song Stuck on the Head: 'Yo ho, Yo ho, A Pirate's life for me...'

I'm so flippin' excited. I jumped on Dee Henderson's website to see what was new and found this ad. I can hardly wait, just a couple of months to go...

BEFORE I WAKE

COMING OCTOBER 2006

Check it out: Read Book Opening

The sheriff of Justice, Illinois, is hunting a killer. Women visiting town are being murdered, tourists in nice hotels, money still in their billfolds, jewelry still on the dresser. Quiet kills - they go to sleep and never awaken. The sheriff is not pleased to find the new detective in town, Rae Gabriella, working the case on behalf of one of the families. She's staying in the same hotel as one of the victims - and her looks suggest she could be the next victim.

PRE-ORDER THIS BOOK

Fun Stuff for Photo Geeks

Song Stuck on the Brain: Prayin' For Daylight


I found a pretty cool little website while playing online. Its http://flagrantdisregard.com/flickr/mosaic.php

This nifty little site lets you upload digital images and you can make calenders, magazine covers, collages, mosaics, etc. I didn't have time to make much, but I did a mosaic of my sisters jewelry designs so you could see a sample. This one is the small mosaic, but you can do medium and large too. Plus you can do more or less pics than I chose.

I thought I'd share the fun so you could all play too. :)

A.

Quiz Time

Song Stuck On the Brain: Hail to the Chief (Blame my co-workers. I think they do it to me on purpose.)

You Are Cyclops

Dedicated and responsible, you will always remain loyal to your cause. You are a commanding leader - after all, you can kill someone just by looking at them. Power: force beams from your eyes

Which of the X-Men Are You?

Life changing video

Trollville has the most amazing video on her blogsite. I thought about posting it here, but decided on the link instead. Go visit the page here. You won't be sorry. EVERYONE needs to see this video. It will put your life in perspective in so many ways.

A.

T-G-I-F!!!

Song Stuck On the Brain: B-I-N-G-O (my psyche was trying to find it's happy place. Hence my reverting to childhood tunes.)

THANK GOD IT'S FRIDAY!!!

I do mean that in every essence that capital letters can lend. Today was one of those days that would have been better spent poking bamboo splinters beneath my fingernails. I'll spare you the gory details, suffice it to say I was sold downriver as a scape goat. Always nice to know how much people love you.

Then, much to my surprise I got a message out of the blue from a guy I haven't heard from in ages. I haven't really assigned that a 'good' or 'bad' status. After the morning I had, it was more of a 'huh, that's interesting' kinda thing.

All I know is that I've got two days comin' that are completely NON work related. I'm gonna hang with my friends and forget that this dumb bat cave even exists.

Only 3 hrs and 15 min until New Stargate episodes.

A.

Rants from an obsessed fan

Today’s Song Stuck on the Brain: Lois and Clark: The Adventures of Superman theme song. I actually thought it was the Indiana Jones theme song at first, and then I realized that I was meshing the two together. They sound a little bit a like. I’ve been re-watching the Lois and Clark series. I’m on season three now.

I am so glad it’s nearly Friday, I can hardly stand it. I’m actually counting down the hours until Stargate airs tomorrow night. (26 ½ hours if you’re interested.) Angel and I re-watched the last four episodes of Stargate: Atlantis last night so the cliffhanger would be fresh on our minds. The writing teams for both SG shows are really good at season enders that leave you traumatized for months. With Atlantis, they left three of the main characters - Rodney, Ronan and John Shepherd - trapped on an enemy Wraith ship. All of Atlantis thinks they’re lost for good. Of course, as a viewer you know they couldn’t possibly have killed off any of those characters, much less all three. Then again… SG-1 killed off Daniel Jackson for a year, so I guess you never can tell.

Come to think of it I actually dreamed about that last night. I dreamed that they DID kill of John Shepherd’s character and instead of doing Atlantis, actor Joe Flanigan switched to doing The 4400. I think my psyche was so traumatized by the idea that his character might really be gone, that I had to create a new place for him. The 4400 is my other favoritest SciFi show. Let’s just hope my dream was a bunch of nonsense like normal.

Oh, I also dreamed that Numb3rs returned and they had cut all of David Krumholtz’s beautiful curly hair off. I actually ranted in my dream. How dare they? How could they cut it all off? Do they even KNOW how much the fans love his hair? Sheesh!

I’m surprised the cancellation of Invasion and Surface haven’t caused me nightmares. What is it with regular network television that they can’t let a really good SciFi show air longer than one season? Besides the few exceptions, like Star Trek and Quantum Leap, few SciFi shows lasted very long. If we were lucky, the SciFi network picked up the good ones and kept them alive. Too bad they didn’t do that with at least Invasion. It was a strong show that really could have gone places. As it is, I’ll never know what happened to Sheriff Tom and the rest of the town in Invasion.

I loved Surface, but I know that it didn’t have as strong a following. I hate it when they do a cliffhanger and then cancel it before answering all the questions they set up for the next season. There should be a law that says if they cancel a show like that, they have to film one final episode to wrap the project. Like John Doe for example. That was the worst cliffhanger for a show I’ve ever seen. After an entire season of watching Digger and John bond as best friends while John tries to discover who he is, they reveal in the last five seconds of the season finale that Digger is the bad guy. Then they pulled the plug. I will never know why Digger betrayed John, why John was gifted or who he was and where he came from. I’ll never know what the Phoenix group was after or what their endgame was. I hate it. John Doe was a fantastic show with a great cast and they let it die.

If I ever get one of those network execs in an office alone, I’m going to string them up by their toes, whip them with wet noodles and force them to listen to Tiny Tim’s Tiptoeing Through the Tulips on continuous play.

I know. Get a life, right?

I will just as soon as my shows are over…
A.

CopyCat Bandwagon

I’m jumping on the ‘copycat’ bandwagon again. I’ve noticed a lot of bloggers have little ‘note of the day’ kind of things at the top of each day’s entry. For example Shanna Swendson has a huge t-shirt collection, so she has a ‘t-shirt of the day’. I’ve seen others that list the song or album currently playing on their ipod. I think those are really fun ideas. I wanna do it too. Unfortunately, I don’t wear t-shirts that say stuff and I don’t have an ipod. I do however have LF Syndrome, and music is always floating through my brain. So MY copycat feature will be: Song Stuck on the Brain.

I actually wanted to start this yesterday, but forgot to post it. I’ve had weird ones lately. Monday it was “Pop Goes the Weasel” (Or, There was a man from Nottingham, who tried to cross the river. What a dope! He tripped on a rope, now look at him shiver. Courtesy of Will Scarlet in Robin Hood Prince of Thieves. ) I can’t take all the blame for that one though. My office mates were conspiring against me. All of them were humming or whistling it at some point during the day.

Tuesday, for no known reason, I had Darth Vader’s theme music stuck in my brain. You know the one they play every time he comes on screen? Yeah, have no idea where that came from.

Today’s Song Stuck on the Brain is “Something More” (I need to praise you) by Kristy Starling. This song makes more sense because I heard it on the radio while getting dressed this morning. However it is not a TYPICAL song for me to get stuck on, so beware.

DISCLAIMER: I am not responsible for anyone else getting these songs stuck on their brain. If you choose to hum, whistle or sing the song when you read the title, and that action induces a state of repetitive melody, it is in no way the fault of this blogger.

Only two more days until we get new Stargate episodes!!! (Doing my happy dance)

A.

Can I get a Wahoo for Chris?!?

Chris Daughtry Inks Record Deal
by Sarah Hall
Jul 10, 2006, 1:10 PM PT



Who needs Fuel when there's solo power?

American Idol fourth runner-up Chris Daughtry, whose elimination from the talent search was perhaps the most controversial event of the fifth season, has signed a record deal with 19 Recordings/RCA Records, the label announced Monday.

Last month, Daughtry turned down an offer to join multi-platinum rock band Fuel, claiming he was "going to be doing my own thing."
Apparently, he knew what he was talking about.
Daughtry's deal is similar to those previously inked by Idol winner Taylor Hicks and runner-up Katharine McPhee.

According to RCA, the North Carolina native will form a band and work with high-profile collaborators to record self- and co-written songs. His first album is expected to be released later this year.

In the meantime, Daughtry has already seen some action on the charts. His cover of Bon Jovi's "Wanted Dead or Alive" from the American Idol Season 5 Encores compilation debuted at number 16 on Billboard's Hot Digital Tracks survey and number 43 on the Hot 100.
Daughtry's performances on the American Idols Live! tour have also earned him unanimous praise from critics since the sold-out tour kicked off last week. The Boston Globe called him "genuinely talented," while the Worcester Telegram & Gazette praised his "signature combination of fire and feeling."

Positive reviews are nothing new to the bald-headed rocker, who was favored by many fans to win the fifth season of Idol.

After he was voted off the talent search, Daughtry admitted that he was taken aback by his elimination because of the glowing feedback he had received from the judges and fans during the competition.

"It's weird because you have all these people telling you for weeks now, 'Oh man you're gonna win this thing. You're gonna win this thing. This is your thing to win. ' And when you have so many people telling you that, you automatically assume this is what America wants," he told People magazine after he was cut.

The win may not have worked out for Daughtry, but it's a safe bet that America will be hearing a lot more from him in any case.

http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,19460,00.html

I'm Baaaack!

Oh my goodness, you all probably think I fell off the face of the earth.

Weeeellll, I did. Thanks to Superman’s Return though, I’m back. (Brandon Routh can save me any day!)

If you haven’t seen our Caped Hero’s return, go see it. It was great. I went with Angel and Eric. I don’t think either of them loved it as much as I did. However they each had different ideas as to why they didn’t like it as much as they expected to.

Angel didn’t like that Superman and Lois are still estranged. I say that’s kind of the point. You want them to be together, but you know that the chances of that working are just about nil. They’re star-crossed lovers. Always have been.

Eric didn’t like that (WARNING: SPOILER ALERT) Superman has a kid. I say that’s a great thing. Superman is super – not immortal. He won’t live forever. Plus, this gives him someone on this planet that he can relate to. He’s really not alone. I loved the way the movie dealt with this as a circle of life thing. Superman’s son is in the same position Clark was. He’s being raised as a normal kid with a foster father, but he’ll have Superman to teach him how to deal with his powers – just like Jor El did for Clark. You feel bad for Clark/Superman because he’s unable to have the kind of relationship he yearns for, but without that tortured soul, the story would have grown stale a long time ago. We may not have super powers, but a lot of us can still identify with Clark/Superman- especially the tortured soul part.

As for the casting, I think it was brilliant. I loved Brandon Routh. He was a great choice. He had big boots to fill and he did it with ease. Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor was a truly inspired choice. He made the cheese more believable. I was a little concerned with Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane, but truly I liked her WAY better than Margot Kidder.

We also squeezed in The Devil Wears Prada, another fantastic movie. Don’t let the chick-lit angle scare you off. Meryl Streep was downright horrid in an absolutely fabulous way. I mean you just LOVE to HATE this woman. Anne Hathaway is stunning. I loved her in her princess form, but she really does have the acting chops to lead a film. She was great. Then of course there’s Stanley Tucci. When doesn’t that man give a fantastic performance? I love him! This movie was about so much more than funny clothes. I highly recommend it.

Okay, so now that I’ve got my most recent reviews out of the way and life is a little more on track, I’ll get back in to the groove of posting. My apologies for dropping out for so long.

See you at the movies,
A.