Flo's Got Answers - Have you got questions?

Dear Flo,

Do shoe companies really think we are going to eat the silica gel?

Signed,
Shoe Fetish

Dear Shoe Fetish,

Well, I certainly wouldn’t eat it. There are so many tastier things to snack on. Like Chocolate. If you really need the extra silica, I’d recommend a healthy serving of worm jell-o. (Worms are optional, but I like the red jello best.) Shoe companies are just protecting themselves against the idiots in the world that don’t know better and might sue them. Since I’m sure you’re a very intelligent person, (aren’t all shoe lovers intelligent?) their warning on the silica packets were not intended for you.


Dear Flo,

My kids love pancakes, which is good since their cheap and I’m poor, but I’m bored silly with eating the same ol’ thing. My son says if I can make birdseed pancakes like Big Bird eats, he’ll try those. You came to mind instantly. Got a good birdseed pancake recipe I can try?

Signed,
Flatter than a Pancake

Dear Pancake,

Big Bird is a dear friend of mine. I can’t count the times we’ve shared gossip over a plate of his delectable birdseed pancakes. It’s a family recipe you know, but he says I can share it with you anyway. Since you probably don’t like birdseed, I’ve substituted poppy seeds in the recipe.

Mama Big Bird’s Lemony Birdseed (poppy seed) Pancakes

Yield: 10 to 12 pancakes
1 cup flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1 Tbls. poppy seeds
1 egg
1 cup non-fat or lowfat lemon yogurt
1 cup frozen lemonade concentrate, thawed
1 cup cold water
Powdered sugar
Pre-heat nonstick griddle or frying pan over medium-low heat. Place dry ingredients in a large bowl and stir to combine. Add egg, yogurt, lemonade concentrate and water. Mix until well blended.
Lightly coat griddle with cooking spray. Using soup ladle, pour batter onto griddle. Turn when bubbles appear and begin to pop on the surface. Sprinkle with powdered sugar and serve.
Enjoy!

Dear Flo,

The sky is falling! The sky is falling! It really is this time, I swear! What should I do?

Signed,
Chicken Little

Dear Chicken Little,

My boy, we’ve been through this before. Sugar, you can’t sleep under an acorn tree, or an apple tree or a walnut tree…or anything else, without wearing protective gear. That last apple that hit you caused some real damage to that birdbrain of yours. I promise, the sky is not falling. Please call Dr. Doolittle’s Hospital of Animal Medicine and Psychiatry at 1-800-Vet-4YOU. I’m sure they can offer you the help you need.

Thank you all so much for your wonderful questions. I look forward to hearing from you again.

Bye-Bye Ya’ll!
Flo

Thanks, Flo, for your words of wisdom. Just a few more things:




CFBA: The book of the moment is The Cubicle Next Door by Siri L. Mitchell. Read another great interview with the author at Scrambled Dregs. It's funny and surprising.



And be sure to enter to win a Projecting A 2007 calendar.
Cheers,
A.