Friday, September 01, 2006

If I were a Superhero

Song Stuck on the Brain: Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects

No, I'm not going to tell you any dirty little secrets. I don't have any....... that I'm willing to share. Besides you already got my Geek Love confession. Isn't that enough for one week?

I was reading my SciFi magazine and the editor was commenting on that fact that Superman's powers weren't useful to an everyday person. You don't need to be faster than a speeding bullet or leap tall buildings. Instead he had a list of powers he would find helpful.

I thought that was a pretty interesting idea and since there's a new series starting soon called Heroes that follows everyday people that are developing powers, I decided to make my own list. Although I do find Superman's power's very cool, I'd settle for these instead.

1. Invisibility. However, I would like to stipulate that this ability be a type of force field that surrounds my clothes as well. I don't want to have to strip constantly like the chick in Fantastic Four.

2. Superhearing. I'm incredibly nosy. I would love to be able to hear things. Terrible, aren't I?

3. Phasing. You know, being able to shift my molecules so that I can walk through solid objects. Imagine how useful that could be. Hands full of groceries and mail? Forget unlocking your door, just walk through it.

4. Time sifting. Run out of time to finish a project? Oversleep? Have no free time? Just finagle the sands in the hourglass and voila, time to spare. I would like to stipulate on this one that all that time finagling would not affect my looks. No premature aging please.

5. Super Metabolism. I don't want to be Ultra Thin Rail Girl, but to have a metabolism that allowed you to eat whatever you want and never workout (or break out) yet still stay a healthy size would be super. Sorry, no pun intended.

6. Who am I kidding. I do want to be able to fly. I'm totally into the idea of traveling the world without ever having to spend hours in airport security or breaking the bank on gas.

7. Alchemy. I want to be able to turn whatever I chose into gold. Note the stipulation of 'whatever I want'. I don't want the Midas Touch from hell.

8. Musical Genius. Yes, I think that in many ways that's a super power. I want to be able to pick up any instrument and be able to play it and sound amazing. That would make song writing SOOO much easier.

9. Stretchy-ness. It just looked like so much fun on the Incredibles.

10. Super Word Power. The ability to punch out best selling books in no time with nary a writer's block or hand cramp to be seen.

Well, there they are in no specific order. I thought about adding Samantha Stephens nose twitching, but that's really more magic than super power. Plus, I can't twitch my nose like her. I'd have to pull a Tabitha and use my finger. Cute at 3 - not so cute when your 28.

So what powers would you choose?


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