Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Introducing "Ask Flo"

Song Stuck on the Brain: Voice of Truth by Casting Crowns

In the ever continuing saga of my house, the Wild Kingdom of Independence, last night my friends and I were joined by the largest grasshopper I've ever seen. This thing was the 'Ahnald' of the insect world. No one else would touch him as he mega-vaulted around the room, so I got a paper towel, snuck up behind him and grabbed him. I wadded the towel up good and was pretty sure he was dead, so I just tossed him in the trash can. I must have missed his little grasshopper cry of, "I'll be back." About an hour later, Lindz opened the lid to throw something away and there he was perched on the side ready to break free. I had to go get him out of the trash and put him out the back door because she was afraid he'd get loose again. I couldn't bring myself to laugh at her fear though, I keep having visions of mice running up my leg or some other equally unrealistic circumstance of 'attack of the killer mouse'.

I thought I'd take the time today to introduce you all to a new member of Projecting A. Flo joined my office on Monday and she's just completely enthralled with the idea of blogging.

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Now she may look like a bird brain, but she's much more than feathers. She actually gives some pretty great advice. She's agreed to come on board as my advice columnist. Since we haven't had any fan letters yet, I thought I'd take today and interview her for your benefit.

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April: "Hi, Flo. Welcome to the blogosphere. Tell everyone a little about yourself."

Flo: "Oh, honey, I've done it all. As a young bird I baby sat for Chicken Little. That was my first job ever. He was such a cute little fluff ball, but he had the worst imagination. Always claiming strange catastrophes were about to happen. I put up with it as long as possible, but when he claimed the sky was falling, well, I just couldn't take anymore. He needed more professional help than I could give.

Since then I've worked as a waitress for the Early Bird Diner, was a Shortage Flyer for the Stork Express. I've even worked in a cosmetics company as a make-up tester."

April: "Wow, you've really had a lot of life experience. Tell me what a shortage flyer is, that's a term I'm not familiar with."

Flo: "Storks aren't the only ones that deliver babies you know. They're certainly the ones that get all the face time in advertising, but really anyone can apply with the company. It's all part of EOE. As a Shortage Flyer I filled in for other birds out with the flu or on vacation. It was a very fulfilling job. There's nothing like seeing the excitement on a parents face when they receive their bundle of joy."

April: "I can imagine. What an exciting job. Sounds to me like you could give advice on a lot of topics. Mind if I ask you to dole out a little sample for our readers?"

Flo: "Sure thing, Darlin'. One thing I always tell people (and birds) is, Don't put all your eggs in one basket."

April: "Oookay. Care to elaborate a little?"

Flo: "Sugar, eggs are heavy. You put them all in one basket and what do you do but just weigh yourself down. Now, you take that metaphor and apply it to life. If you count too much on ONE thing, you wind up carrying a big old load of worry. What if the basket breaks? You'll lose everything. How can you live your life with joy if you're always worried that the bottom is gonna drop out? Give some of those eggs over to others who can help you carry them. Better yet, let Jesus carry 'em. He's the only one strong enough to carry 'em all and gentle enough to not crack a one."

April: "Thanks, Flo. That is good advice. Thanks for sharing and I know we'll be hearing from you again soon."

Flo: "Sure thing, Darlin'. Always glad to chat a little."

For those of you interested in hearing more from Flo, she'll be taking emails through my box. Ask her about her life or ask her advice. Just put "Ask Flo" in the comment line and email her here. There's a link on the side bar too.

Thanks for stopping by,

1 comment:

chubby-girl said...

Nice to meet you Flo! Welcome to the blog. Ape, tell Lindsey I said "hi!". I need to get her email and/or phone number sometime.