Hopping Around the Blogosphere

It's a new year. Time for new plans, resolutions, plots and characters. I was extremely blessed to have Dysfunction Junction published in 2013. Now it's a new year and time to work on all the new plots and outlines I've tucked aside. But before I get into that, I want to take a moment to introduce you to the author who invited me to be a part of this Blog Hop. KC Sprayberry has been a friend and fellow writer for quite a few years now and it's been amazing to see her success sky rocket, especially this year. She's been a great help in my writing journey as well.

KC Sprayberry was born and raised in Southern California. She spent time in the Air Force and was stationed for several years in Europe, specifically Germany and Spain and later transferring to a base in Phoenix where her love affair with the Old West begin. Since then, she's learned to explore every possible place of mystery, romance, adventure, or history no matter where she is. Her home is now in Northwest Georgia, in a small town brimming with history. Her sense of adventure now takes its turn on the pages of her computer screen as she translates a lifetime of discovery into stories for those who love her work. As to when she'll stop writing? To quote her husband, "When they nail the coffin closed."

You can visit KC Sprayberry's blog HERE.


Now on to this year's questions!

1) What am I working on?

In addition to marketing my latest release Dysfunction Junction? Cuz let me tell you, that takes a lot more time than I expected - and I expected it to be time consuming! :)

There is a sequel in the works to Dysfunction Junction. This book will feature Kianna's best friend and roommate Alexa Fehr. Alexa has a major life change ahead of her, one that is really going to make her take a step back and take a new look at her life and what God has planned for her. Of course there will be plenty of humor to go with that drama. That's kind of my trademark.

 

 

I have a new Christian suspense in the opening stages. Can't give too much away, but let's just say that there will be a stalker, a kidnapping, a little human trafficking... and a very unique gift of sight. I'm very excited about this one. My sister Angel had a great initial concept and between the 2 of us we had the whole outline plotted in 2 days over Christmas break. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the writing goes just as quickly! LOL!
 

A cover mock up I played with

 

I also have a second suspense novel with the working title of Burning Justice that features an arsonist and the fire fighting heroes that work so hard to be our every day heroes. It will hopefully be getting a few touch ups and then sent on to a few publishers to see if I can get a nibble.

In addition to writing adult Christian Fiction, I've also written a few children's books. One, titled Creation's Ballad, is being illustrated by my mom. She's a very talented artist. I look forward to seeing that published in the near future.

 

Keep your eyes open for updates on all of these projects and anything new that might pop up. I never know what might come up!

2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?

My current novel, Dysfunction Junction, is what many would term Christian Chick-lit, but it's so much more than that! Yes, it features a young single working girl looking for love and success amidst romance and comedy; but it's also a deeper look at what so many of us see in our every day lives. Abusive relationships amongst friends and family, infidelity, the struggle with personal self-confidence and acceptance.

Kianna is plus-sized, but her actual size is never listed. That was done intentionally. The point was for any one that struggles with self-image and weight to be able to identify with Kianna, no matter whether she was 5 pounds overweight or 150+ pounds overweight. Even those who aren't plus sized often still face the same self-image doubts and weaknesses. It was more important to share the heart and emotion at the center of it all.

The book is also written in first person present tense. Not overly common, but I hope it gives the reader the chance to really 'get inside' Kianna. I tried it initially in several formats, but I didn't find my writer's voice until this final format.

One more thing that may set my writing apart from other's, is also one of the most important for me. It's that I'm able to share my beliefs and witness of Jesus and the Restoration Gospel with freedom. I admire many other publishing houses and Christian authors, if you follow my blog you know what a big fan I am. However in my writing journey, I found that I was trying to simplify my message or watering it down to make it fit what the Worldview Publishers would accept. I got a lot of compliments, but no contracts. It wasn't until I told God I would no longer water things down in order to try and publish - that I would write everything straight forward and publish independently if necessary - that things changed. I did a final re-write on Dysfunction Junction and added back in those things I'd left out. A few months later a fellow writer friend convinced me to submit to Muse It Up Publishing. Within 10 days of submission I had a contract. No doubt God will open doors if you write the message He gives you!

3) Why do I write what I do?

To share my love of the Restoration Gospel of Jesus Christ with a new generation - and I want to do it in a way that captivates them in such a way that when they are done, they want to know more. I want to witness of Jesus' love in all our lives, no matter our size or station in life. Every year our world gets crazier and crazier. Stories of war, terrorism and murder is only part of it. The channels are filling constantly with Paparazzi gossip of all the misbehavior - partying, drugs, cheating, sleeping around, eating disorders, bullying... The list could go on.

Jesus knocking at the door of your heart by Greg Olsen

In all, I feel like no matter what story is written, any story can be made entertaining and engrossing as well as identifiable and touching. Every story can share HIS message without the reader feeling like it's irrelevant.

4) How does my writing process work?

Every book is completely different! LOL! I suppose there are some similarities. Generally, I get my concept and I see the pivotal scene or final plot twist that peaks in the end of the story. I write that scene and then work my way back to figure out how I got there. I do a basic outline and then cast all my characters. Once I start writing, things will probably change. As they do and the story grows, I go back and expand my outline to make it more detailed. In those cases I generally know how the book will end and start, but I have to come up with the middle.

Then there are times when I start with the character and the beginning and concept but have no idea how it will end. That is an interesting journey! So backward to my general process.

But since every story is unique, I kind of expect each to grow out of it's own unique process. It also is a good way to push my own boundaries as a writer. I don't think there will ever be a time when I will feel like I have nothing left to learn.

Be sure to check out these participating blogs next week:

Donna Alice Patton is another longtime writer friend and associate. Her writing is fantastic and she's so great to work with. :)

Donna Alice Patton

 

Donna Alice Patton is a freelance writer and history buff living in rural Ohio. She is the author of three books - The Search for the Madonna and The Gift of Summer Snow for children for adults – Roses are Red, Diamonds are Blue.

"I always say that I had to become a writer. It was the only legitimate excuse I could have for daydreaming all day!"

As far back as Donna could remember she loved to make up stories and characters. In one of her Memory Boxes, she has books that she made as a child. Each has a scribble of picture and a line or two of story. She loved nothing better than to create a whole new world or write 'sequels' to her favorite TV shows or books. One of her favorite authors was and still is Laura Ingalls Wilder. She wanted to grow up to be just like Laura and write books people would read for years and years. Recently she was able to take a trip to visit the places where Ms. Wilder lived and worked. 

 

"It was a thrill to see where my childhood heroine's books came to life..."
 

You can visit her at: Layers of Life

Barbara Ehrentreu

Barbara, a retired teacher with a Masters degree in Reading and Writing K-12 and seventeen years of teaching experience lives with her family in Stamford, Connecticut. When she received her Masters degree she began writing seriously. If I Could Be Like Jennifer Taylor, Barbara’s first YA novel, was published by MuseItUp Publishing, September 16th and was inspired by Paula Danziger. This novel recently won 2nd place in the Preditors & Editors Poll for the Best Young Adult Book of 2011. Her second YA novel, When My Life Changed is scheduled to be released by MuseItUp Publishing this summer or fall. In addition, Barbara has a story in the anthology, Lavender Dreams, also published by MuseItUp Publishing. All proceeds from this anthology go to cancer research. Barbara also writes poetry and three of her poems are included in the anthology, Prompted: An International Collection of Poems, a collaboration of members of The Anthologists and five are in Beyond the Dark Room also with The Anthologists. Her blog, Barbara’s Meanderings, http://barbaraehrentreu.blogspot.com/, is networked on both Facebook and Blog Catalog. She hosts RRWL Tales from the Pages (Red River Writers Live Tales from the Pages) on Blog Talk Radio every 4th Thursday. In addition, her children's story, “The Trouble with Follow the Leader” and an adult story, “Out on a Ledge” are published online She has written book reviews for Authorlink.com. and several of her reviews have been on Acewriters and Celebrity Café. She is a member of SCBWI. Writing is her life!

Visit her at: Barbara's Meanderings

 

Rochelle Weber

 

 

Rochelle Weber is a Navy veteran and holds a BA in Communications from Columbia College in Chicago with an emphasis on Creative Writing. “Would you like fries with that?” Her novels Rock Bound and Rock Crazy are available in both e-book and print. She edits the Marketing for Romance Writers Newsletter, as well as for Jupiter Gardens Press. Rochelle battles bi-polar disorder, quipping, “You haven’t lived until you’ve been the only woman on the locked ward at the VA.” Her song, “It’s Not My Fault,” won a gold medal in the National Veterans Creative Arts Competition. She lives in Round Lake Beach, Illinois. She has two daughters (one engaged, one married), four grandchildren, one step-grandson, two grown step-granddaughters, and one step-great-granddaughter. Two cats allow her to live in their house and cater to their every whim.

Visit her at: Rochelle Weber--Author

Good News!

I received word today that my chick-lit novel is a finalist in the STAR contest. Whoo Hoo! It never hurts for an agent and editor to look at your stuff, right? Maybe I'll inch a little bit further down the road to publishing. :)

Come visit Seekerville

Song Stuck on the Brain: Oh Happy Day as sung by the choir in Sister Act

There's a reason for this one... Today I guest blog on Seekerville. I'm so excited and honored to be a part of this group of great bloggers.

Click HERE to read my debut!

A.

Long Distance from Cloud Nine

Song Stuck on the Brain: Forever by Mariah Carey

I am floating high on cloud nine. Why? Because I got a surprise phone call last night.

Remember the Daphne contest? I entered as a last minute lark hoping for some helpful feedback from the judges. When I didn't receive a phone call by the date listed on the website, I assumed that meant I didn't final - and I wasn't really all that shocked. Until last night when the contest coordinator called to tell me that BURNING JUSTICE, is an Inspirational finalist in KOD's Daphne du Maurier Award for Excellence in Mystery/Suspense, Unpublished Division.

WOW! You could have knocked me over with a feather. After thanking her, I hung up and screamed while doing the snoopy dance. Jack thought I had lost it for sure. It was a fantastic way to end what had been a crummy kind of day.

I sent in my 2nd round enteries in today. The judges are Melissa Endlich of Steeple Hill (editor) and Karen Solem of Spencer Hill Associates (agent). I'm not sure when they will announce the winners. The ceremony is held at the RWA conference in July this year, so I assume they'll do it then. Even if I don't place, maybe I'll get a request for a full anyway...

I can't help but hope that I'll place after making it this far, but to be honest I'm just psyched to have finaled at all. It's a great opportunity. And to make it even more fun and exciting, a fellow critique group member, Kelly, is also a finalist in the same category. How cool would it be if we both placed?

A.

New hobby anyone?

Song Stuck on the Brain: You'll Always be My Baby by Mariah Carey/David Cook (love a hometown boy!)

So what's new with me? Nothing. I'm still reworking my ms Dysfunction Junction to resubmit to The Agent. I'm waiting on pins and needles for my critiques of Burning Justice from the Daphne contest and I'm conducting an interview Thursday for research on my next Work in Progress, Perilous Truth.

I did hear from an old critique partner today. Judith Mamay is published! You go, Girl! Her book, Knowing Joseph, is being released by Blooming Tree Press in hardback and is available for pre-order at BarnesandNoble.com and Amazon.com. I'm so proud to say I knew her when. I wish you all the success in the world, Judith!

Ah, I wish I had more exciting news than this, but sadly, I don't. I must make more of an effort to be exciting. :) It must be time to learn a new hobby. I'm not sure what it would be or when I would find time to do it, but I'm sure that it's time. I would like to learn to shoot. As in guns? I've always wanted to have Dad take me out to the firing range and teach me, but somehow we never got around to it and now he's not able. I think it would be fun, plus it would be fantastic research for my writing. I think it would be especially helpful in this current WIP. Off the top of my head, I'm drawing a blank on other ideas. I'll have to think about it.

Anyone have any ideas?
A.


P.S. Just for Fun...

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Milady the Most Honourable April the Gnomic of Lower Beanthrop in the Hedge Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

What's new

Song Stuck on the Brain: The Lion Sleeps Tonight

I've been so lax in posting my thought lately, but trust me, you haven't missed much. :) Mostly because I've been busy and fighting off a nasty head cold, so the only thing in my brain right now is cotton.

Let's see, so what have I been up to? I've started research on my next book, a suspense set in the jungles of Mexico. I have several interviews to line up for this, as well as a lot of material to read. There's a lot of archaeological info needed, but I've got a strong start. I'm excited about this one though, I really hope it turns out on paper as well as I see it in my head.

I've also started watching Paul McKenna's I Can Make You Thin on TLC. It's been life changing. I can't believe something that makes so much sense, that's so practical and simple, is making such a huge difference where nothing else has. I'm very excited. If you have a chance to check him out, do.

On a lighter note, we had family lunch at my parent's house Sunday. This is a weekly occurrence and there are so many of us, we can't all sit around the table, so usually, Dad and I sit at the table with all the kids and the other adults sit in the living room with TV trays. This arrangement can lead to some really interesting conversations and echoes. I'll start telling Dad a story and Mom can't hear it all so she asks Angel what I'm talking about and suddenly there's an echo conversation in the living room. Sitting at a table full of kids can elicit some unusual stories too. Allie had one this time.

"April, did you know my mom got a new job at the mall?" Allie is sitting next to me poking at her lunch. She's squeezed into a booster seat that's too little for her, but she insists that she loves her seat and she can't sit without it.

"I did. She's cutting hair at a new salon, right?"

"Yep. And she's making really good money too!" She's very emphatic and animated. "She makes like $30 -$40 a day! That's a lot."

"That is good." Dad and I smile at each other.

"Yeah. But she says she has to spend it all on gas though, the kind you put in your car - not the kind you fart." She never wavers in her story as she plows on past this little nugget.

Dad and I lose it. We're trying not to laugh, but we can't help it. Allie doesn't realize for a minute that she's even said anything funny. When she does she blushes a little and laughs too.

Priceless.
A.

Gravel and Ankle Alarms

Song Stuck on the Brain: The Mighty Quinn

I bragged about having Weds. off to enjoy fantabulous weather, but I spoke too soon. Unbeknownst to me, Angel arranged to have new gravel poured on hers and our parents driveways. Angel took care of her own. It's a single width and there wasn't much to spread, but our parents drive was a different story. They have a double wide that parks four cars. And the guy tried to dump it evenly, but the rut at the end that necessitated the new gravel in the first place, caused a lot of the gravel to dump at one end. Which meant Angel and I got to spread it. Alone. By ourselves. Why didn't she wait until we could arrange to have our strong young nephews there? NO. I. Dea.

Have I mentioned that I'm STILL recovering from surgery? That my incision is not completely healed and I am even more of a wuss and weakling than normal? (which is REALLY bad)

I started out raking while she shoveled, but after 5 minutes I thought I was going to die. Dad was watching and wishing he was able to help. He said, "Wouldn't it be great if someone came along and said, 'I've got a Bobcat, I'll help'?" Oh Hallelujah, wouldn't that be divine?

Please God, send us a Bobcat.

He didn't. But He did let me survive the ordeal. We finished in about an hour and a half, with Angel doing the heavier load, poor thing. (Show her not to order gravel without help again...)

The rest of the day was pretty aimless cuz we were too sore and pooped to do much else.

The odd thing is, once it was all said and done, the thought that crossed my mind was, "If I ever need to describe this in a book, at least it will be real."

And I find that that kind of thinking pops up more than I realize. As a writer, I'm naturally curious and it makes sense that I would want to observe or experience things. We call it "research". Anything can be research, whether you're currently writing about it or not. It's the universal excuse for oddly intense curiosity.

Thursday, my office mate was holding an interview in our office. Our desks face each other and he and the interviewee were sitting across the room from me. At one point the interviewee reveals that he's actually on house arrest.

"See? I'm wearing my ankle bracelet." I see him move to raise his pant leg.

My coworker says, "Oh, I've heard of those but never seen one in person." I can tell he's now thinking, 'Hmm, how do I respond to that?'

My response? I had this almost uncontrollable urge to pop up and say, "Ooo. Let me see. I might need to describe one someday." I say almost, because I did control myself, but it surprised me with how close I came to doing it.

I have to say, if I had my choice, I'd be researching day spas, concerts, elite vacation spots and penalty free shopping. I mean, when am I going to use gravel and ankle alarms in a novel?

Wait, that gives me an idea...

A.

Agent update

Song Stuck on the Brain: Always

Sooo, I got a response back from the agent that had requested a full ms of my chick lit novel. I was flipping through my mail when I saw it. It was light, no more than one sheet, and I got the worst case of butterflies. One sheet can't be good, can it? Probably a form rejection, she thought it was terrible, I can't open this... Taking a deep breath, I set it aside and saved it for last. Then I reminded myself (and God) that I had put this whole thing in His hands and whatever the letter said, I'd accept it graciously. (Read: I'll only cry, whine and chocolate binge for ONE day.)

I opened the letter and read two very short sentences. Needs stronger hook. May resubmit. It was signed, Looking forward to hearing from you, AGENT. (No, I'm not telling you her name.)

Hmmm. It's not a rejection. I can work on a stronger hook, and if she's inviting me to resubmit, she must have liked something, right?

Wahoo!!! All my butterflies landed and I got busy thanking God. No, it's still not a guarantee of a contract, or a sale, or a bestseller. But it's a step forward on this path toward traditional publishing and I'll gladly take whatever encouragement I can find.

Next up is to rework the ms and try again. Encouraging words and prayers are welcome. :)

A.

Third is better than fourth, right?

Song Stuck on the Brain: Once in a Lifetime by Keith Urban

Today has been a total Monday. I'm glad I'm still working half days.

I spent this afternoon pounding away on my book. I spent Sunday afternoon revising the last half of the outline, so now I think I'm ready for the final charge straight to the end. I need to manage about 6,000 words a day in order to reach my first self imposed deadline. I need time to revise and review a little before sending it off to the agent.

I had decent hope that she might really like the book, but today I received notice that I placed third out of the four finalists. Hey, it's not last place right? It has me wondering why she requested the full ms if I only placed third, but I'm not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. As a writer, you can't ignore opportunity right? It doesn't knock regularly.

So, despite my lackluster finish in the contest, I'm going to continue killing myself and get this book done. If nothing else I'll have a finished book to work at rewriting. :)

It's funny how working on one book stirs up a ton of ideas for other projects. Today I decided I need to find out how to sabotage a car so that it creates an electrical fire while the driver is in route. The fire would then damage the electronic locks and trap her in her vehicle. I'm trying to decide who best to ask, without getting pegged as a psycho would be arsonist. :)

"I swear, officer! It's research for my book! What have I published? Um a sweet inspirational romance, but really I'm aiming for suspense in the next one."

Boy that could be an interesting conversation. Wait until I ask them about gun running... That's book three.

Got to go pound the keys elsewhere now.
Have a happy Monday,

A.

Final Good-Byes

Song Stuck on the Brain: Enough by Erwin. Another original. What can I say, I've been digging back into the song writing and it doesn't take much to get one stuck on my head.

Today is Flashback Tuesday. Absolutely nothing exciting happened to me today, so I'm pulling an old short story I wrote EONS ago. (Like maybe 10 years?)

It's kind of funny to go back and read the old stuff. I did clean it up a little gramatically, but I didn't change much cuz I wanted it to stay true to it's original feeling. Which is rather melodramatic. I had a thing during highschool about death. I wrote a lot about lovers being parted by it, I worked hard to make the reader cry. Actually, I just wrote a lot about tragedy in general. I'm sure it was my form of therapy and I have to admit I think it helped.

So, here is one of my better pieces from that time period. Feel free to comment away and don't be shy about telling me if it stinks. I'm a writer, I'm used to it. :)

Final Good Byes

I sat on an old vinyl couch in complete shock. The dirty, white walls, ceiling and floor fade together to form a gray void that seemed to close in all around me. Voices and shapes drift past my mind, but I am only conscious of the all-consuming throb that flows through my body to the very marrow of my bones. Conscious of only one thing, he’s gone forever. Lost to eternity.

The night re-plays in my mind. I was alone when the phone rang.
“Rachel?” Josh’s father asks, his voice rough.
“Yes.” Dread tightens my stomach.
“Josh was in a wreck. It’s bad. We need you to come right away.” His voice cracks and I can hear the heartache in his words.
“I’m coming.”

I threw on the first thing I found in my closet and ran. Rain pounded as I left for the hospital, and the windshield wipers squeak across the window of my car. Clinging to the steering wheel, I mutter the same heartfelt prayer over and over.

“Lord, I can’t lose him. Please, don’t take him away.”

I am so scared. Josh and I know that our relationship is special. The kind of love it’s hard to find and keep. The thought of losing that…well, I don’t even want to consider it.

I pull into the emergency room driveway, well over the speed limit. Tires squeal on the wet pavement as the car slides to a halt. I’m lucky I don’t cause my own accident, but I’m not thinking clearly. Instead, I scramble from my car as I shove it into park. Dashing tears from my eyes, I try to pull myself together.

“Lord, I love him. Please, jut let him be all right.” My whispered prayers continue. The emergency room doors slide open and I enter my waking nightmare.

Josh’s parents meet me at the door. His mom looks as horrible as I feel. Her nose is red and swollen, her eyes puffy, tears running down her cheeks. She pulls me into her arms and clings to me. She and I have been close ever since Josh and I became a serious couple. I’ve even started calling her Mom. I kiss her damp cheek.

“Hi, Mom, where is he? What happened? Is he going to be okay?” The questions pour out of me like the rain falling outside.

“He’s in the ICU. A drunk driver hit him. Please, Rachel, he’s begging to see you.” Her hands tremble as she leads me down the hall and leaves me alone with the only man I’ve ever loved.
When I walk into his room, the smell of death and sickness hangs heavy in the air. The tang of sterile cleansers and blood mingle and turn my stomach. Tubes run in and out of his body while machines click and beep as they take their readings. It’s dark in the room with only a small light over his bed.

I hate the ICU. It’s threatening to take my love and never give him back.

I walk slowly to his bedside and take his hand in mine. Holding it to my lips, I kiss his fingers and press my cheek against his palm. Tears slide down my face and across his bruised fingers.

“Josh,” my voice catches. “I love you. If you can hear me, open your eyes.” My voice is shaking now. “Please, Baby. Open your eyes.”

“Rachel?” Josh’s eyes flutter open. His small smile looks more like a grimace. He flexes his thumb and wipes a stray tear away.

“Josh! Oh, Baby, are you okay?” My voice is choked. “Do you need anything? Should I get the nurses?” I turn to get help but he won’t let me.

“Rachel, don’t go. Don’t leave me. I need to talk to you.” With the little strength he has left, he pulls me down onto the edge of the bed next to him.

“Josh, we can talk, but shouldn’t I get someone to help first?” I try again to stand but Josh catches my wrist. It hurts to see him this way. I just want someone to fix it, to make it all go away.

“It’s okay, Rachel. I don’t think we have that much time and I need to say some things.”

At this, I began to cry in earnest. “Josh, don’t say things like that. You’re going to be okay.”

He raises his hand and wipes at the tears. “Shhh, just listen to me, Baby. When that car hit mine, something strange happened.” Josh closes his eyes, quiet for a moment. When he opens them again, there’s a strange light about them. They glow with peace and inner calm.

“Rachel, I didn’t even see him coming. I just remember hearing the tires squeal and then feeling like everything around me had exploded. I don’t remember the ambulances or anything. I do remember feeling like I was floating. I heard a voice telling me that I could come home soon, but I needed to say good-bye first.”

I shudder as another sob breaks over me. “Josh, you can’t leave me. I need you. We all need you. You have to fight!”

“Come here, Rachel.” He tugs on my hand again and I gently lay down on the bed next to him. He holds me the best he can, despite the wires and tubes. His arms are warm, strong, and tender. I carefully snuggle against him, laying my cheek on his shoulder.

“Rach, you have to let me go. I don’t know where your road will take you, but I want you to know how blessed I am to love you. I’ve always been blessed to have you in my life.” He pauses to take a ragged breath. I can tell that just the simple act of talking is taking all his strength.

“I had a ring picked out.” He smiles. “I wanted us to be together, forever. You are everything that I could have ever wanted, and more.” He kisses the top of my head and then I feel his own tears mingle with mine as he kisses my lips.

“I don’t want to say good-bye.” I whisper.

“I don’t either, but promise me that you will live and love again. You’re too precious to lock your heart away. Lean on God, Rachel. Let Him work things out in your heart.” He pauses again as a shudder racks his body. It makes me shudder too, because now I know what it means.

“Take care of my parents for me. We’ve said our good-byes but you will need each other. And, Baby, no matter what happens, know that I will always be watching over you.” He cradles my cheek in one hand and I read the love in his blue eyes. I brush back a wave of dark hair and run my finger lightly over his bandage. Not even the cut on his forehead could diminish his good looks.

We kiss again. His lips are swollen and there is a cut on his lower lip. Salty from our mingled tears, they’re warm and familiar. At that moment it is the sweetest kiss I’ve ever known. He sighs and I feel his breath brush my cheek. I tighten my arms around his neck. We hold each other and cry, letting our hearts and our tears say what words can’t.

Time loses all meaning until I hear his monitor flat line. It’s a wicked sound to my ears and that is when things began to blur together. Nurses and doctors pull me from his room, and somehow I end up on the ugly vinyl coach. There I sit, pain wrapped around me like a fog and our last kiss still burning on my lips.

I know that most people don’t have those last few moments, and I will always treasure them. It’s in part because of those few precious moments that I was able to let God work towards healing my pain. Maybe I won’t ever understand all the whys, but I am quickly learning that they don’t matter as much as I thought they did.

God gave me a gift, a precious gift that I wouldn’t have missed for the entire world. I had the love of a wonderful man who cherished me, and I have a beautiful last kiss to remember. I’ve learned that the only way to survive the pain is to not reject it but embrace it. All of it. The good memories, the sad memories, and then in turn embrace God. His heart is big enough to hold all the hurts there are in this world.

I’m thankful for a lot, but most of all I’m thankful for final good-byes.

(c) April Erwin

Writing through the fear

Song Stuck on the Brain: What Goes Around Comes Around by Justin Timberlake

Yay, it's finally Friday. I may be only working half days, but it still felt like a long week. It's amazing how a six and a half week absence can change your perceptive about your work week. Or maybe it's just my prescriptions.

On the plus side the half days at work have been great for my writing. I've been pushing to write 4,000 words a day, which for me is REALLY good. Dysfunction Junction is shaping up well and I feel good about the way the plot lines are falling together. I've been praying really hard that the words would come in a way that would make sense and praise God, they have been.

I think I let this book get the best of me before I ever even started. Somehow it just seemed so complicated in my head. There is so many things that have to be included and tie together so they make sense. The book in my head just seemed impossible for me to write. Plus there is a lot of personal experience tied into this book. Not specific events really, just lessons I've learned. Feeling I've experienced first hand and decided would be best served with openness and honesty.

Jeez, reading this makes my little Chick lit sound like the next great American novel, and I'm sure it's not. But I am finding that it's not as scary to write as I thought it would be. I will say, that each book I've written has been a creature all it's own. I mistakenly thought that once I had one book under my belt, all the rest would fall write into place with out any trouble because I already knew how to write a book. I was wrong. The books haven't been harder to write, and I have learned a lot to improve the process, but each book pulls me down a different emotional path and they've each required a slightly different process to complete. I can see why writer's consider their works as children. Not only have they invested blood, sweat and tears in them, but they each are unique.

I may or may not get an agent this go round, but I can't help but feel that finishing this book is going to change my writing career. Maybe only because I learned that I can do the scary and survive.

A.

Is there an agent in my future?

Song Stuck on the Brain: Do you know the Muffin Man?


I was released from the hospital on Monday October 1st. Spent one day at my parents and then, finally, got to come home. YAY! I took a week at home to get my bearings with the intention of going back to work part time the following Monday (8th).

My first day back at work wasn't too bad. I was tired, but sure I'd be in the next day with no trouble. That was until I woke up at 4:30 am Tuesday on a Tilt -a Whirl. I have never experienced dizzy like that before. It was so bad it felt like the two halves of my brain were being ripped apart by centrifugal force. Oh yeah, and then there was the vomiting. I won't elaborate.

Short of it is, I ended up in the ER, concerned it might be a complication from the surgery. Good news is that it's not related to the surgery. Bad news is it's Vertigo and I got another prescription. One more that has the power to knock me out cold. Needless to say, I haven't been able to go back to work again. I'm aiming for tomorrow afternoon as long as all goes well. The dizziness has improved a great deal.

As for really good news, I was notified by email on Tuesday that I have an agent interested in seeing the full manuscript for my inspiration chick lit novel Dysfunction Junction. I've got a month to finish it up and send it out. I swear I screamed out loud when I read the email. It's positively thrilling and terribly scary all at the same time.

I know that a request for a full MS doesn't guarantee a contract, nor does a contract with an agent guarantee a sale. However, this is still a big step forward and it will be exciting to see where it goes. Ultimately it's in God's hands and that's the best place for it to be anyway.

Thank you all for your continued prayers and well wishes. I appreciate you all so much.

A.

P.S. If you haven't entered the contest to win 2 books by Chris Well, be sure to enter today by clicking the book covers at the top of the sidebar. Contest ends at midnight on October 31, 2007. Good luck!

Drumroll Please...

I work with some of the most creative and talented people. No, not in the batcave, on the internet. (Although some of the cave people are pretty talented too.)

I work with two different online critique groups. The ladies are fantastic and it's nice to have a writer family. Recently, I discovered that several of these talented ladies received some really great writerly news. I think they deserve a great big e-party, so I'm throwing them one.

Donna received an honorable mention in the W.I.N. contest for her MG book Cattle Rustling Catastrophe. This is a great accomplishment and well deserved. Cattle Rustling is a funny and adventerous book about a very real little girl named Jenny. I adore, Jenny. I can't wait for her to find a home with a publisher. Congrats, Donna. Have some chocolate.

Melanie placed second in the inspirational category of the Dixie First Chapter Contest for her story, The Woodcutter's Daughter. This novel is going to be a big hit. I can feel it in my bones as my Grandma would say. The plot is fun and I completely fell for the hero. Congrats, Mel. Have a big bowl of ice cream.

Last but certainly not least, Kelly placed first in the inspirational category of the Dixie First Chapter Contest for Kitty's Fire, a romantic suspense about woman firefighter. PLUS, she's been signed by a really great agent. WhooHoo, Kelly! Have a great big slice of party cake.


I'm so proud of these ladies. They've worked so hard to achieve success. Now, I just have to pray some of it rubs off on me. :)

Party on girls, you deserve it.

A.

You thought you'd heard it all

Song Stuck on the Brain: Long Trip Alone by Dierks Bentley. Got the new album this weekend and listened to it all day long. I really love this track.

So, I know I've told you all about some of my weird dreams, so this probably won't come as a surprise to you, but I had a doozy of one last night. In fact, I have to say, I think this was my strangest one yet. And for me to say that - well, let's just say it was a REAL doozy.

It's always hard for me to relate these dreams to people and really capture the oddness of them, but I'm going to try. Have you ever had a dream and been both actively participating in it, as well as a disembodied voyeur? Well, that's how last night's was. I felt and saw everything as if I was in my own body, seeing with my own eyes -yet at the same time I was watching myself as if I was just some disinterested party.

Best I remember, it started with my meeting up with an old friend that was pregnant. She was only about six months along. Then, after visiting with her, things shifted and suddenly I realized I was pregnant too. Like it was a flu bug to be caught. Logically I knew there was nothing I had done to be in that condition, but yet there I was, feeling the baby kick and waiting with baited breath for the chance to hold my own child. Next, I was in a room with my friend again. Now, she was holding her baby. I took it into my arms and as I held this perfect little person, I felt this amazing sense of rightness. It felt RIGHT to hold this baby, and I couldn't wait to hold my own.

From there the dream went kind of hazy, just vague images and sensations of day to day activities leading up to delivery and feeling pregnant. Then I went into labor. Having never experienced that before, I couldn't tell you how realistic it was, but it FELT realistic. It's always amazed me how the subconscious can conjure things to such a realistic level when you've never experienced it before. Like once when I dreamed I was shot in the heart, the labor felt intensely realistic. I was in a delivery room, in the stirrups, going through all the normal (I would suppose) things, when I suddenly delivered.

From my ear.

Yeah, my ear. It was all normal up to that point then, with a cock of my head a clear balloon like object the size of a large orange, squeezed out of my left ear. The doctor caught it and held it up for me to see. Inside was the tiniest baby I'd ever seen. Completely perfect in every way and no longer than a grain of long rice. The doctor took it away to a nursery where I knew the nurses would burst the sack and place the baby in an incubator to continue growing to full size. I was excited and yet still feeling all the pain from labor. Then at that moment, I saw myself again from a distance, I looked as if I'd just gone through a major battle, a wounded soldier laying their bleeding with tubes and sensors taped to me. I was completely limp, like everything had been taken out of me completely. Then I was seeing through my own eyes again.

That's pretty much where that dream ended, there were others throughout the night, but none as bizarre as this one. I laughed about it this morning, because it was just so odd. Dreaming about being pregnant or having a baby is not really a new thing for me, but this one was just so present and real, plus it had a grittier feel to it. It's hard to explain.

After thinking about it for a while, I came up with this conclusion. My pregnancy or baby was a dream or idea I was laboring to give birth to. Which is why when I did deliver, it came from my brain. It was the birth of my creative mind. Which is what? My novels? Cuz, I could of been giving birth to quintuplets if that's the case. I think it was more the concept of just acknowledging my dream to be a writer and be able to give birth or completion to all the stories that are floating around in my mind. And let me tell you, the labor analogy ain't no joke when it comes to birthing a finished book.

I've got to wonder, do other writer's do this? I don't know if it's my vivid imagination or just that for me dreams seem to be a way for me to work through issues, but what a nutty way to acknowledge all my angst and inner turmoil as a writer. And if this dream has any bearing on my life at all, I hope the labor pains end soon, cuz I'd really like to be cradling my finished book right now and not still groaning as I try to squeeze it from my brains.

Sheesh. I told you my dreams were weird.

A.

CFBA: Christian Writer's Market Guide by Sally Stuart

Song Stuck on the Brain: Hello Goodbye by the Beatles. Yesterday's Byrds' song must have triggered a 60's marathon. It's been one right after the other.

This week, the Christian Fiction Blog Alliance is introducing the Christian Writer's Market Guide by Sally Stuart. WaterBrook Press; Pap/Cdr edition (January 16, 2007)

ABOUT THE BOOK:
For more than twenty years, the Christian Writers’ Market Guide has offered indispensable help to Christian writers. This year, for the first time, this valuable resource comes with a CD-ROM of the full text, so you can search with ease for topics, publishers, and other specific names.

The 2007 edition also includes up-to-date listings of more than 1,200 markets for books, articles, stories, poetry, and greeting cards, including information on forty new book publishers, eighty-three new periodicals, and thirty-four new literary agents. Perfect for writers in every phase, this is the resource to get noticed–and get published.

It contains listings for: 695 periodicals, 228 poetry markets, 355 book publishers, 133 online publications, 29 print-on-demand publishers, 1185 markets for the written word, 321 photography markets, 31 e-book publishers, 122 foreign markets, 112 literary agents,and 59 newspapers.

It also gives you comprehensive lists of contests, writers groups and conferences, search engines, pay rates and submission guidelines, editorial services and websites.

Christian Writers’ Market Guide is a "must have' for any serious Christian writer that is looking to get published!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Sally E. Stuart is the author of thirty-four books and has sold more than one thousand articles and columns. Her long-term involvement with the Christian Writers' Market Guide as well as her marketing columns for the Christian Communicator, Oregon Christian Writers, and The Advanced Christian Writer, make her a sought-after speaker and a leading authority on Christian markets and the business of writing. Stuart is the mother of three and grandmother of eight.

MY TAKE:
Getting to 'review' this book has been a great opportunity for me as a writer. The guide has so much invaluable information in it, and it's easy to use. The accompanying CD rom is a nice touch as well. Very handy.

A.

Is it Monday... Again?

Song Stuck on the Brain: Turn, Turn, Turn by The Byrds. This would be thanks to Stacy, the leader of our little on-line Bible study group. We've been discussing joy and the different ways to find Joy in your relationship with Jesus. Today she brought up the scripture in Ecclesiastes where it describes all the things that have a time and season. That of course triggered the song. At least I know all the lyrics to this one. :)

We've been snowed upon again. About five inches over a little ice. Not too bad this go round. I didn't get stuck on my way to work and I only fishtailed a couple of times. That's a good snow fall for us. It's a really pretty snow too. Fluffy, like mounds of potato flakes and powdered sugar. (Hmm, must be hungry - that's a lot of food references.)

I wanted to stay home today, but I couldn't bring myself to play hooky. I've been so not in the mood for work lately. At least not my paying job work. I swear I feel like I've been here a week already and it's only Tuesday. That does not bode well for the rest of the week.

What I'd really like to be doing is reading. I'm in the middle of Randy Ingermanson's Double Vision and I really want to go home and finish it. Then, I want to get to writing some more. I've been working on one project, Burning Justice, for a long time. I had intended to try and enter it in a couple of contests this year, but I just discovered that the first chapter is all wrong as the first chapter. I know what I need to write, but I'm suddenly feeling very burnt out on this story. I'm just too close to it right now. So, I've decided to set it aside for a little while and try to focus on something completely different.

There are several other projects to chose from. A Science Fiction series, a middle grade kids novel, and a Romance just to name a few. I think I'm going to start with the kids book though. It's shorter, I've never done a middle grade before and I really like the story. I have an outline, but nothing else. I've got to get rolling on it, before it drives me nuts. I'm going to add my WIP word counts to the side bar, maybe that will get me motivated. (Yeah, Right.)

Don't forget, today is the last day to enter the drawing to win an autographed copy of Abiding Darkness. Contest is open to US and Canadian residents only and ends tonight at midnight.

Good Luck!
A.

Maybe...

Song Stuck on the Brain: Smack That by Akon feat. Eminem. Ugh. I really hate this song. My nephew has it as his ring back song so I had to listen to it when I called him. Now it's Stuck in my head. Just the chorus... smack that, all on the floor, smack that, give me some more, smack that, 'till you get sore... Ugh. That's not lyrics, it's garbage.

Speaking of lyrics, my 24 hour mope ended at 11pm last night and in honor of that I wrote lyrics to a new song. No accompaniment yet, just words. I suppose to the lyricist the words have meaning, so Akon or whoever wrote that song probably doesn't think the lyrics are garbage.

My new lyrics have personal meaning to me, but who knows? Maybe the rest of the world would think my lyrics are ridiculous. For that matter, six months from now, I may come back and read my new song and think, "OMG, this is terrible." Funny how time gives you perspective. I have a lot of songs that I look back on and cringe. I keep them in my folder though just to show myself how bad it can get.

This new song kind of stemmed from an old crush from eons ago (at least it seems that long). I know I'm over him, but it seems like whenever something goes wrong in my life and I feel just the least bit emotionally vulnerable, I dream about him. Which totally unnerves me for the rest of the next day. I'm sure there's a psychological reason for it, but I'm beginning to think that trying to untangle my psyche would just be too scary. Better to leave it alone.

Anyway, here are the new lyrics. The song is called Maybe.

Maybe
©April Erwin
1/30/07

I thought I’d put you away
Like a dark secret no one should see
Hid all my thoughts of love
Told the world I was finally free.
But here you come again
Strolling through my dreams like you belong.
I wake with a heart that’s blue
And I realize I was wrong.

Maybe you’ll change your mind
Maybe you’ll come back to me
Maybe you’re really the one
But maybe’s a long time to see.

It’s usually the lonely days
When my world seems to fall apart,
Days when I hurt the most
That I dig down deep in my heart.
Unconsciously I find the seed
Of hope that I’ve hidden away.
Hope that time was all we lacked
And someday you’ll come home to stay.

Maybe you’ll change your mind
Maybe you’ll come back to me
Maybe you’re really the one
But maybe’s a long time to see.

Hours roll into days
And days into years
And still I’m holding on
But dreams like this can’t live
In the bright light of day
It’s time that hope was gone.

Maybe you’ll change your mind
Maybe you’ll come back to me
Maybe you’re really the one
But maybe’s a long time to see.

This would be the rough draft version. A lot of times the phrasing or rhythm changes when the music comes.

I suppose it doesn't really matter whether the song is caca or not. It did something for me. It allowed me to purge something I was feeling and it prodded my creative center to write something after it's confidence was bruised. In fact, the song will probably never see the recording booth, but it turned my juices back on and now I'm already mulling over a short story I'd like to finish.

Maybe this old crush was worth something after all...

A.

Reminder... Don't forget to enter the contest to win a copy of my first book Missing Pieces and the puzzle key chains. Enter by clicking the link at the top of the sidebar. Winners will be announced February 1, 2007. Good luck!